b r a n d e d l a d y

i'm an evil
done every bad things
that's what they've said
and that's what they've known

judge me
i won't prove anything
coz U have eyes to look at me
coz U have mind to think like what u like
that's your rights
and who am I to blame you all
for what u want, for what u think about

after all,
only me who knows the real me
and all i know is
i want to be worth
for someone who can accept all my imperfection

hey rare treasure,
perhaps you won't know, how i really hard to try
to be better and better and better, everyday
So if we meet one day,
i'd be the jewel that can embellish and cherish you

Hey precious,
see me i'm not an evil
i've never meant to be an evil

psychoneurotic

YOU
Who d'hell are u??
I don't even know who you really are
But i got a crush on you, definitely
At d'first time i met you

What are u made of??
You really are adored by d'people
But i find it's hard for me to impress you
Though maybe here, i'm d'one who has d'wrong


YOU CHANGE YOU JUDGE
Maybe you conscious, or perhaps you don't realize, indeed
But i'm not that insensitive,
From d'deepest of my heart, i feel it
U've changed
Not to yourself, nor everybody,
It's on me, only to me

Freak, you named me
Eschew, you did me
We even haven't known each other very well
But you've judged me already, made your own decision
All by yourself


PSYCHONEUROTIC ON ME
No regret here in my mind, no hurt here in my heart
All i can say is
It's just miserable to look at d'situation
And stoppin myself from askin why

psychoneurtic,
There i could be
I may do -ignore-eveythin'-about-you-
But i choose to deal with those
'Coz I can too live on my very own life


BYE BYE MEANS BYE BYE
I find myself try so hard to delete you
And I keep trying to move on
All i can do is wipe you off,
everytime -you-things- infuse on my blood

Past will be past
As the time goes bye,
Bye-bye will never so hard
I might break up, but i recover

G I F T

G I F T
Is anythin given; anythin voluntarily transferred by 1 person 2 another without compensation;
a present; an offerin. [1913 Webster]

Gift is sumthin that sumone give for another
Gift can be anykind, whether absolutely shaped like d'object
or obscurely shaped like d'treatment
Treatments are like doin sumthin, givin attention, hearin sumone, helpin, it can be anykind..
While d'objects are like flower, candy, food, parfume, apparel, n' so on n' so on..

About d'gift ,
Don't ask about d'feeling when we get it, it may b vary from one another due to many reasons
And don't ask about what's d'purpose of that gift in', it also may be any kind of causes
So be thankful for everythin we've got,
Be grateful for what we have as a gift

Don't ask for anythin.. except how to manage it very well..
Put the giftin' their own best place in our life
We decide what we're gonna do with that...
And of course, use it wisely for good purpose only...

I'm glad when i get a gift, especially when that's what I've been expectin for
I also heart of giftin' sumthin, particularly when d'gift was really sumthin sumone needed

In giftin, try to do d'best in sincere
That's become d'proof that we're alive,
That we can do sumthin for d'human being
So never ever regret for what we've given

And when we get a gift more than what we've been expectin for,
When we get the really amazing gift from sumone...
Believe and remember that as our reflection
That perhaps we haven't give sumthin really great for others in the past
Make that reflection as defiance for ourself,
That just by now, we can do it like those best gifter did, and maybe
better...


happy gifting everyone! :D

-No-Enthusiasm-@-All-

What do u want?? What do u expect??
grrrrrrr
I need no man nor male in escort within my life
But for this time, i need a brand new job
And definitely the vacation to refresh all these bulks within

Then i'll set my life as free as an independent woman, indeed
Maybe cheered up with the adopted children
And have my master degree done, before the set
Ohh i want that kind of life

Ahhhhh, it's been so flat but no smooth at all,
It's been boring yet thrillin at the same time

But could u just stick with ur dream??
I'm struggling to attain those all
Goin' along with sacrifice
I can't lie that sumtimes i get a perplexing orientation

- In my relationship life -
Why, when he had no enthusiasm at all,
I acted like that's the problem for me
Broken and wrecked
Didn't i want to walk away from him?
Why, when i had a talk with him,
I flew onto the air so so high, soared up to the sky..
Happy overated
Didn't i want to clean up my heart-my mind-my life from him?

Sigh.. i get dissoriented sumtimes but fuck with that
Just stick with what i've been dreamin about

What soo what??
I know theres sumthin wrong inside myself
I do really know i have problem.....
Matter just does exist there
But i dont know, is that d'real problem?
Or where's d'real one??

Is it a test, God??
I shouldn't ask ....
So, how to do d'best while we walk through these all ??
That's it
Perhaps... i still dont get anything about this...
Yea, maybe not now, later indeed....


And after all.... why am I asking a lot eventually???

Arrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrggghh i hate this circumstance

and d' dream came true

i just scared with falling down,
although the hope was rising up...

"Don't be such a thing as over!"
they said, took it lightly

"There's a thing called 'brain-strength'!"
some other people said, whooped on me

"I keep on believing that i can achieve what i want,
just don't give up!" i spoke 2 myself, hundreds time

and w/ efforts and prays, that all came in 1 package,
eventually brought me 2 d'platform of
attaining my improbable dream

so thank you for everyone whom helped me on
believing and fulfilling my own dream
cant make it without you....
family n friends,
may God bless U all....

A Letter for You

D'things I wanna tell U, may b d'things U don't wanna hear...
But d'worst is that I don't really wanna tell U so,
D'things I wanna tell U, are d'things I can't say...
Bcoz when i do that, it may end up with Ur leaving,
Eventhough U've already done that 2 me

I wonder, why U left me behind without notice
Where's exactly d'part that decide U on keeping me away?
Have U forgotten the happiness of being separated in togetherness?
But perhaps U don't even really know,
how those all always brighten my day
Don't U know that I miss U?

I am starting hopeless, while it seems only Ur shadow left here,
and even i know it's just too much, still...
by now i'm praying for U not 2 leave...
But in d'end... i'll let U go if that's Ur decree,
Coz that's Ur life after all...
and in another way.. i need my life to be rearranged